Mother's Day!

First off, let me say even though it's kinda late, Happy Mother's Day! I hope everyone had a great day filled with family and nothing to do cause everyone else did it for you! I had lots of thoughts today. Most of them during early hours in the morning!

Sleep for me last night didn't take place. Between the baby and Braxton waking up, I only got to sleep for a half hour at a time until 4 am! It was LONG!!! At one point while I was putting the baby back in bed after feeding him, I started thinking, if something happened to me right now and this was the last time I kissed my baby and put him in his bed, what would I be thinking. These are a few thoughts that rolled through my head:

I wish I would have hugged my kids more. I wish I would have held Porter more. I wish I would have played with Braxton and Cole outside more. I wish I would have yelled less. I wish I could take away all the bad things in their lives. I wish I was better. I wish they were happy all the time and never sad. Mostly I'd wish and hope that I'd let them know I love them more than life itself, no matter what!

I hope that my kids know that I love them more than life itself! More than anything I'll ever own, more than anything I ever say or do! I will ALWAYS LOVE THEM no matter what, no strings attached, no matter where their lives will take them. I am their mom and nothing, not even death would ever change that!

I hope that one day I will feel worthy enough to even be their mom! I know that most days I probably don't deserve it, but I am very thankful that a truly loving Heavenly Father blessed me with his children, and trusted me enough to hold them close!